poetry from July 2008

"(learning to be a) master of control"

a tangle of indestingushable emotion and desire
drives me to the edge with worry and fear
it makes me feel sick, uncertain and queer

hijacked some time in the unsettled ocean
of my heart soul and mind
elevates and illuminates like a full moonlit night
and dissipates so quickly - i just can't unwind

As I seek to execute any consciouss objective,
or to simply feel comfortable in expressing myself,
I am constantly betrayed by my own neurochemistry and physiology.
- It can feel so unkind.

If I could stay in the drivers seat for some length of time
I could show You who I am ... and I would like that.

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